Most of the time I like to keep my Blog free from too much complaining, however today will be an exception.
I feel truly wretched at the moment. This germ that inhabits my body does not seem to want to leave, and I can honestly say there has been next to no improvement in my condition. I feel let down by my body. I usually find I can kick these things pretty quickly, but this just feels like it is going no where.
It has completely knocked me sideways. Normally I feel able to function relatively well, going about my daily busy life, until the thing disappears. At the moment I am, (reluctantly), getting up for work each morning, doing my two hours, then coming home and collapsing, not being able to face College. I have taken the last two days off, and if I wake up tomorrow with no improvement, it will be the same outcome.
I feel the frustration bubbling up in me, in great danger of exploding in an out of character rage, which will probably be directed at poor Benny, I find that sitting in silence not doing anything is the only way to sate this frustration, as any attempt to do any thing, invariably results in me dropping something, or banging in to some thing, or dropping something on my self, (I nearly fell into the dishwasher yesterday). I'm trying to speak to my body and find out what it needs, but it has gone uncharacteristically silent on me. Food seems to be rejected as does sleep, the two things needed by the body for healing, all it seems to accept at the moment is ibrubrofen and water.
To top this all off Benny is now also sick, (no surprises there, if somebody sneezes in Australia Benny seems to pick it up), so I feel trapped in this house of germs, staring at the four walls. I haven't even felt like beading, that's how bad it is. The days drift by and I feel I've lost so much time, all I want is for it to pass so that I can start working on repairing my body. I realised the other day that I still treat my body like I did when I was in my early 20's. Now that I've hit my third decade I can not continue to abuse it the way I do, Other wise this happens.
I dearly hope that you are all in good health out there, and stay that way
xx
Oh Dear sweet Lynsey, I truly hope you can shake this illness from you and get better. I don't know if you have tried chicken broth only, but you need some kind of nourishment besides water. I don't even know what kind of cold remedies are sold in the stores there. I always dope up on Nightquil or Alkizelzer plus cold and flu those seem to work for me. Take care and try to get some food into you.
ReplyDeleteTherese
Oh Therese, thank you so much for you're lovely comments.
ReplyDeleteI think I've come over the hump, but I think my post was borne out of pure depression and frustration yesterday, I woke feeling a bit better today, but still could not face College I do seem to be managing food now, I'm limited on what remedy's I can take as i'm allergic to paracetamol, which is in most cold and flu remedy's, I'm struggling on. I hope that tomorrow will be better.